Mother's Day and Memories

Mother's Day is tomorrow and I am feeling a bit nostalgic. Some days - many days - I miss all that went with being a young mother. I miss diapers and lotions and formula. I miss the feel of a squishy child snuggling in my arms. I miss the "tuck ins" at bedtime with stories and songs. I miss the pitter patter of Jesse's little feet as he walked to my bedroom way too early in the morning to say, "mom, the suns up - you make pancakes now????"

I miss spaghetti faces and peanut butter kisses. I miss bathtime and bedtime and the sweet smell of a clean child. I miss the sweaty smell of a little boy who is dirty from playing all day. I miss the funny words spoken as a two year old begins to talk. I miss the "guna" also know as the screwdriver. No matter how many times I would try to teach Josh to say "screwdriver" he would always say, "guna". I would say it really slow "screwwwwwwdrrriiiivvver" and he would say, "guuuuuuunnnnnna". Oh, he was so funny.

I miss summer time when school was out, I miss the "owies" that only I could make better. I miss Sesame Street, HeMan and Saved by the Bell. I miss Grandpa's pool with Aunt Kari and the girls. I miss Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny. I miss the Happy Meal with the toy inside. I miss soccer balls and baseballs with cleats and cups and baseball gloves. I miss soccer games and baseball games with seeds, sodas and sunburns.

I miss my little boys.

I am a different kind of mother now. My little boys are grown men and even though our lives are different and they don't need me like they used to we continue to make memories and enjoy life's experiences. They are my friends, my future and the joy of my life. They continue to give me laughter and love and now the feel of a squishy child snuggling in my arms comes from two very special little girls who call me "grandma".